They say “Eyes are the windows to our soul.” And that is true most of the time. Especially so, when you are being interviewed and the Interviewer is looking keenly at you for fishing out the flaws or shortcomings in you. Well, this is what happens in the famed SSB Interview, where if you are not making proper eye contact with the interviewer, you will be instantly considered to be a shy, weak and confused being.
Therefore, as it is important for you to express your views and opinions in words confidently, it is equally important for you to maintain right amount of eye contact with the interviewer. But there are many of you who feel nervous when are asked to look into someone’s eyes and talk. You should overcome this fear and start following the below tips to prep up your eye contact skills for the SSB Interview.
Tip 1 : Start right away!
Take a deep breath and relax yourself before you start talking. Look into the eyes of the individual before you start speaking. The best thing to do in the SSB Interview is to walk straight into the room when called, keep a normal and balanced eye contact with the authorities, do a handshake and smile. Do not break eye contact in between. Then sit. Do not start looking around you once you sit. Keep a light smile at the corner of your mouth and try to smile with your eyes. Don’t frown or grin. Don’t make your eye contact look too creepy by staring more than 5 seconds in their eyes. Look to their side and talk. Come back and look into his eyes for another 5 seconds and again withdraw your gaze. Don’t look away too swiftly. This will show that you are not willing to continue the conversation any longer. Don’t look down on your hands or the floor, or up in the ceiling, while you are speaking or are spoken to. This shows your inattentiveness and disrespect. Use the 50/70 rule, maintain eye contact 50 % of the time when you speak, and 70 % when you are spoken to. You can break the gaze while you are making a gesture or nodding.
Tip 2 : Don’t be afraid or nervous!
You need to understand that if the other person is looking at you and you are looking at the person too, he is not going to eat you up. So stop being afraid and nervous. Boost up your confidence level and overcome your fear by practising. Start with staring at your family members of close friends when they are talking. Make it a point to do so. Start by looking into their eyes for 10 seconds, and then increasing the time gradually to 20, then 30, then 40 and finally to 60 seconds or 1 minute. Don’t stare at them uncomfortably or as if you want to pick a fight with them. Try moving back and forth between the two eyes, rather than staying focused on one. Keep focused on one for 10 seconds or so, then switch to the other. After that, you can start practising with strangers, like looking into the eyes of the shopkeeper while grocery shopping or into the eyes of the waiter while ordering for your favourite coffee or ice cream! If looking someone directly in the eyes is too stressful, instead look at a spot on their nose, mouth, or chin.
Tip 3 : Maintain eye contact with the Group
This is a pro level of your skill. While it is easier to maintain eye contact with an individual, you also need to practice maintaining eye contact with a group, especially during Group Discussion or GD in the SSB Interview. Well, don’t fix your gaze to any one person in the group. As you speak, choose one person in the group and pretend that you are talking just with that person. Look at him as you finish your thought or sentence. As you begin a new sentence or idea, choose another person in the group and look her in the eye as you finish your thought. Make sure that you eventually include everyone in the group, or else others can feel bored when you don’t include them in your conversation.
Tip 4 : Practice by yourself
Use a mirror. Have a conversation with yourself in the mirror. Maintain good eye contact with yourself. Practice all the above tips while you are talking to yourself in the mirror. Practice regularly and develop your eye contact skills in no time!
Remember, the inability to maintain eye contact with the person while speaking is a kind of Social Anxiety Disorder. If you find that your social anxiety is severe to the point that looking someone in the eye is overly distressing, seek help from a mental health professional or your family doctor. If you have not already been diagnosed with SAD, your symptoms will be assessed and a treatment plan for your unique situation drawn up. However, if you follow the above-mentioned ways, they will surely help you in your SSB Interview and help you overcome the anxiety to maintain eye contact with individuals. And above all, relax, work hard and believe in yourself. Jai Hind!
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It would be a great perception to have some guidelines like this one.